Although it’s surprising that there aren’t more gay guys playing football at an elite level, the reality is that sport doesn’t get much gayer than soccer.

If you want to demonstrate that you’re up-to-speed with the off-side rule, or if you just want to project your locker-room fantasies onto some fit guys, then this selection of some of the world’s best footballers is a good place to start.

Yann Sommer, Switzerland
A sexy goal-keeper with strong hands. Known for his love of cooking. I’m dreaming of a romantic fondue date.

Heung-min Son, South Korea
He plays for UK club Tottenham, and his bromance with ex-teammate Kevin Wimmer is adorable. He could invade my demilitarised zone.

Cristiano Ronaldo, Portugal
I really want Ronaldo to take his bromance with Badr Hari to the next level.

André Silva, Portugal
That moustache. That baby-face. It’s just all too cute. He plays for AC Milan, but his Instagram suggests that he really wants to model.

Mohamed Salah, Egypt
Mo Salah is one of the greatest players, so it was disappointing to see that during the recent World Cup he and his teammates from the Egyptian squad allowed themselves to be used as propaganda to bolster the image of anti-gay Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov. Chechnya was selected as the training base for the Egyptian squad.

Nacer Chadli, Belgium
Chadli gets bonus points for his nude photo shoot a couple of years ago. It’s an example that more players should follow.

David Silva, Spain
Those eyes, those cheekbones. Silva has recently become a father. Total Xaddy.

Philippe Coutinho, Brazil
Signed to Barcelona in one of the most expensive deals in football history, it’s Coutinho’s tattoos that have got my attention. Every inch of him is inked. Well, maybe not every inch, but a lot of him.

Kylian Mbappé, France
He’s only young, but Mbappé is already making a name for himself as an intelligent and articulate leader on and off the field.

Mats Hummels, Germany
Handsome, moody, but also has a playful side. Hummels is known for his charitable work — particularly focused on helping to bring football to under-privileged kids.

Nicolás Tagliafico, Argentina
His Insta feed is full of loved-up photos of Tagliafico and his girlfriend, but there’s something about Argentine guys that’s just irresistible.

James Rodríguez, Colombia
He looks young and fresh-faced, but Rodriguez has a lot going on. He’s just launched his own crypto-currency. But what I like are the salsa moves he performs after a scoring a goal, and he scores a lot of goals.

Maya Yoshida, Japan
A rock-solid defender, Yoshida plays with UK club Southampton. He’s surprisingly tall.

Dele Alli, England
With a fashion line already released, Dele is a stylish guy. I really like his brotherhood bond with Harry Hickford. Dele moved in with Hickford’s family when he was 13, and they’ve been close ever since. They’re still living together, but they’ve upgraded to a fairly massive house in Hertfordshire.

Edinson Cavani, Uruguay
One of Uruguay’s top-scorers, Cavani gives good hair-ography.

Read more from Gareth Johnson