We went behind the scenes to ask them some questions.
#PrEPChats – The Series
In the series, five men share their experiences of using PrEP – why they started using it, what it means to them, and how they’ve benefited from using this HIV prevention tool.
Andrei heads up an International Franchise Division for a British fashion retailer. He was born in Barbados and raised in the UK with family of British, Bajan, and Indian origin.
Duane is a Filipino-born, UAE-raised, and London-residing set designer who hates being asked where he’s from.
British-born of Afro-Guyanese descent, Blaize is a marketing communications professional and freelance musician based in London.
Phil Samba is a British-born Sierra Leonean writer, activist and PrEP advocate who works in the HIV and sexual health sector.
Fahad is a South Asian queer man.
Myths and Misconceptions
Phil Samba sits down with Duane, Blaize and Andrei to talk through what PrEP is, how you take it and what PrEP means to the people who use it.
We explore the reasons why PrEP use among men of colour is comparatively low and how we can improve on this.
Intimacy and Expectations
Phil, Duane, Blaize and Andrei discuss vulnerability, coming out, and how family expectations impact the way they feel about themselves and their place in the world.
Sex and Love
Phil, Duane, Blaize and Andrei discuss how using PrEP has affected the way the feel about sex and love.
Be sure of your HIV status
Terrence Higgins Trust is offering free and totally confidential HIV self test kits.
These kits allow you to do your own test at home and know your results in just minutes.
If you would like to order one of these kits completely free please visit THT’s Fastest at Home page (UK Only).
We want to hear your opinion
“My first thought was — I’m dead.”
In 1985, Derek Canas underwent heart surgery to correct a congenital anomaly — he was three months old.
The surgery was a success, but 16 years later Derek was diagnosed with AIDS — he had acquired HIV as a result of a blood transfusion during the heart surgery.
Derek is now a DJ and a campaigner for HIV awareness. Derek shared his story with Mainly Male.
When you were first diagnosed, how much did you and your family know about HIV?
The only thing I knew at that time was a few memories of a Nick News episode years before. I was diagnosed in 2001. My first thought was — “I’m dead.”
Thankfully, I had a great doctor who told me that I would that I would be going to his funeral, that he wasn’t going to mine. I had an AIDS diagnosis and wasting syndrome — I was weeks away from death.
What sort of counselling and support was available to you when you first diagnosed?
Just at doctors’ appointments. I live in a small town, there were no support groups close by. Family and close friends became my support system.
Have you encountered any stigma or discrimination as a result of your status?
Yes — especially in the early days after diagnosis. It’s just part of living in a small town. The understanding of the virus is still stuck in the mindset of the early-90s. Sadly, that’s nationwide — public knowledge is really lacking in terms of HIV.
You speak publicly about HIV and educate people about the virus — do you ever feel like taking some time out? Do you ever feel like you don’t want to have to explain your status to people that you meet?
I don’t take time out for myself. My cardiologist hates that — I’m on my fifth pace-maker. I always welcome the opportunity to explain my HIV status. I wear it like a badge of honour. The virus nearly killed me, and I’ve fought back — I’m the one that’s kicking its ass now.
What advice or guidance would you give to someone who has been recently diagnosed with HIV?
The days after are rough — don’t be ashamed of the breakdown. You’ll feel better as your health gets better. It just takes time and patience.
Do you have any hints or tips for people on how to respond to HIV stigma or discrimination?
I use music to get me through. I’m a DJ, so I know how powerful music is on our minds and bodies. I always encourage people to find their music or movies — something that helps them laugh or get hyped-up.
Keep a calendar — put things on it, no matter how small — always look forward. Tomorrow can and will be better.
Everyone gets knocked down in life. It’s about how you stand back up.
Sharing the stories of our community
It’s not easy to talk about HIV, but talking about your experience can help to build your confidence and understanding of what HIV means for you. Your story can also help others who are processing their own experiences with HIV.
If you’d like to share your story with the readers of Mainly Male, please email [email protected]
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