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How do gay men have sex?

Photo by Ihor Malytskyi on Unsplash

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Ever wondered how gay men have sex? Ever wondered if other guys are having a similar experience to you?

We decided to run a quick survey to see what insights we could gather about the sex lives of gay men.

117 guys responded to our survey.

  • 92% of respondents identified their sexuality as Gay.
  • 8% of respondents identified their sexuality as Bisexual.

Here’s what they told us:

In general, how often do you have sex?

  • More than once a week: 26%
  • About once a week: 21%
  • A couple of times each month: 16%
  • At least once a month: 10%
  • Less than once a month: 16%
  • I don’t have sex: 11%

When you have sex with someone, what do you enjoy the most?

  • Oral sex — giving: 18%
  • Oral sex — receiving: 11%
  • Anal sex — giving: 14%
  • Anal sex — receiving: 31%
  • Mutual masturbation: 26%

“I like all of the above, plus watching and being watched by interested parties.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“Rimming is what I enjoy the most.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“What I like is being played with by two or more men.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“Kissing. Seriously. I could do it for hours.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“I’m a CBT Dom into ball busting.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“Kissing is next to godliness, and rimming comes a close second.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“I enjoy sex a lot better after a few cocktails…” — Paul, Twitter

“I used to be 100% top when I was younger. Now I lean more towards a total bottom. As I got older it is like something has been awakened in my ass and it craves cock.” — Coyote, Twitter

When you have sex with someone, what do you feel most confident doing?

  • Oral sex — giving: 35%
  • Oral sex — receiving: 11%
  • Anal sex — giving: 11%
  • Anal sex — receiving: 19%
  • Mutual masturbation: 24%

“I’m happy doing all of that but I prefer to bottom. However I have been praised on my topping ability.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“I’ve rarely have I met anyone who is good at giving oral.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“I love giving anal sex, but sometime I get all caught up in my head — especially if we’re with a new playmate. That leads to a cock that doesn’t get fully hard. That can be embarrassing sometimes. When receiving anal, you can get lost in the sexual ecstasy and it’s amazing. Also, if there are more than two of you, that just adds to the thrill.” — Coyote, Twitter

“I’m deaf, and when it comes to social meets I tend to prefer sex to chat! My preferred scene is a group massage with like-minded friends, ending up with a fuck-session. A joy to watch, to give, and to receive — all naked and horny together!” — Owen, Twitter

When you’re having sex with someone, do you explore any of the following:

  • Role plays: 41%
  • BDSM: 31%
  • Fetish wear: 48%
  • Sex toys or dildos: 58%
  • Chems: 9%
  • Threesomes: 58%
  • Group sex: 39%
  • Watersports: 27%
  • Spanking: 34%
  • Fisting: 10%
  • Poppers: 42%

“Threesomes is something that my husband and I have been exploring more. It takes a while to find the right dynamic, but it’s well worth the wait. It’s definitely worth exploring with someone with a big age difference. It isn’t just about having sex, it’s about having a sexual experience. If you have an age difference, different sexual talents are brought to the bedroom.” — Coyote, Twitter

“I would add foot fetish to the list.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“I also like suspension and wrestling.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“Rimming. Armpits. Socks. Underwear.” — anonymous survey respondent.

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“Sex toys is another level of exploring that is well worth it. Put a prostrate massage toy in your partner and that leaves you freed up to do other things. The sensation of sexual pleasure from multiple erogenous zones makes for a great orgasm.” — Coyote, Twitter

Do you use any dating or hook-up apps?

  • Yes: 62%
  • No: 38%

“I’ve discovered that you don’t need to have an hour to have an intense time. Nothing wrong with a quickie — especially if you’re out and about and not home.” — Simon, Twitter

Which dating or hook-up apps do you use?

  • Grindr: 74%
  • Scruff: 33%
  • Hornet: 4%
  • Fab Guys: 7%
  • Recon: 11%
  • Gaydar: 4%
  • Daddyhunt: 7%
  • Planet Romeo: 4%

“We use Scruff, Grindr, and Daddy hunt. It’s a great way to screen guys to see if they just want a quick hook-up or something a little more than a one-time shot. We tend to lean toward guys who are looking for more of a casual friend-with-benefits. We also have a rule where we meet the guy first before we invite him over. The sexual energy has to be right or else it throws off the whole sexual experience.” — Coyote, Twitter

Are you in a relationship?

  • Yes: 61%
  • No: 39%

“The best of love is built on a foundation of friendship and the best sex is built on the foundation of love.” — P-Man, Twitter

“A personal connection with a human being makes sex way better!” — Alejandro, Twitter

How long have you been in a relationship?

  • I’m not in a relationship: 39%
  • Less than six months: 3%
  • Between six months to one year: 3%
  • Between one year to three years: 6%
  • Between three years to five years: 4%
  • Longer than five years: 45%

“I cherish the un-obvious things. The reaction of the married guy’s erection when I touch his hand. The spontaneity of a man ejaculating when I kiss his lips. My desire to surrender to his most intimate areas in an act of breathless submission and recognition that he is man, that we are man, and our desire is need, want, lust, love, renewal, and redemption. A map that guides the way back to being a respected husband and father and bread winner. At least until the next time.” — Stanley, Twitter

Is your relationship monogamous?

  • I’m not in a relationship: 39%
  • Yes — we’re monogamous: 29%
  • No — we’re not monogamous: 32%

“We are monogamous, but together we sometimes play with others.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“We play with other people but only as a couple.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“If I had a relationship it would be monogamous.” — anonymous survey respondent.

“We’ve been in our current relationship for 6 years, married for 4 years, and ethically non-monogamous for 2 years.” — Coyote, Twitter

Methodology

  • The survey was conducted across a two-week period in June 2018.
  • Respondents were recruited via Twitter and Facebook. No incentives were offered for respondents to complete the survey.
  • We used Survey Monkey to collect the survey responses, and then analysed the results manually.
  • Comments from respondents were captured during the survey process, or via social media during the survey recruitment process.

Read more from Gareth Johnson

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Health

Everything You Need to Know About Penis Augmentation

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Photo by Charles Deluvio via Unsplash
Photo by Charles Deluvio via Unsplash

Life happens only once, and imagine that you’re not satisfied with the size of your penis. In the past, you simply had to live with it, perhaps having difficulties getting someone into bed or always having self-esteem issues. However, times did change a lot, and nowadays you can give your penis the upgrade that it deserves. Penis enlargement methods have become extremely popular and very common, with an increase of 120% in the last couple of years. So, if you have any plans of enlarging your little fellow, there are things that you need to know, as this is not a small thing to do (pun intended).

The enlargement: then and now

Penis-enlargement methods, some of them safe while other unsafe, have flooded the market for quite some time now. You can choose from many options, such as pumps, surgical penis enlargements, and even pills. Be as it may, there is a difference to the times we’re living in now. If you opt for a surgery, you need to pay attention to certain things and it’s definitely not a piece of cake, but there are is also a safer way in which you can enlarge your penis.

Why do men opt for this step?

There’s a question that’s probably older than the Bible — does size matter? No matter what your opinion on this is, size is crucial to some men. Even though it might not enhance the performance as a lover or nothing of that sort, the boost of confidence and self-esteem plays a big role here. Now, is it worth it to get through the process of pumping, eating pills or even living the pain of the surgery just to get your penis bigger and boost your confidence? If that’s something that will make you happy, then you should definitely consider it.

However, a lot of men can opt for a non-surgical penis augmentation lately, which is great for increasing the penis girth, with many guys describing it as an “unqualified success”. Performed with the help of fillers, this somewhat new penis enlargement method promises minimal discomfort, clinically proven results, and quick recovery.

The procedure

This non-surgical penis enlargement method is definitely the safest and the least painful of them all.

Even though the idea of having fillers injected into your penis might sound extremely painful, that’s nothing that a bit of numbing cream cannot resolve, which basically means that you won’t be feeling a thing. Bear in mind that the idea behind this procedure is to increase the girth of the penis, but the added weight of the filler lengthens the penis in many cases, as well. As far as the fillers go, it’s very important that you do your homework beforehand and go to the best clinic possible. There are many injectable fillers out there that can lead to serious issues, so don’t try to save money on this procedure if you really want it. What’s also good to know is that there are fillers that are reversible, which means that it can be melted away. This piece of information is very valuable, as you always have the option of removing it if you’re not satisfied with it afterwards.

Target audience

Even though practically every man can enlarge his penis, some are simply better candidates than others. For example, people who have a “hidden penis” might be the most important candidates for the procedure (even though in many cases the patient has to go through liposuction first to remove the excessive fat around his penis). Another group of people are those who have their penis constrained (also known as “buried penis”), which means that not all of it hangs outside the body. This option might require a surgical procedure to release the ligament and thus make the penis hang more outside of the body. And finally, there are those people (perhaps even you) who are simply not satisfied with the length or girth of their penis. This case might be the easiest, and they are considered as the best candidates for this penis enlargement method.

Bear in mind that this is not a small thing to plan ahead. If you opt for one, make sure to choose the method that’s best for you, the least painful, and the safest. Once again — do not save money on this. If you’re sure that you want to make your penis longer, at least get the best service there is.

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