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Blowjobs in Berlin

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Want to know how to give the best blowjob of your life? Michael Soze of Boner Magazine has put together this handy guide.

Why is it called a blowjob?
The name itself isn’t particularly accurate. Nothing is blown here. The theory is that the term is derived from the slang of English prostitutes — to ‘blow off’ was to drain the steam, to release the pressure from the pipe.

Who invented the blowjob?
The earliest recorded blowjobs have been found on papyrus scrolls from Ancient Egypt. But the blowjob also appears in the records of the ancient civilisations of China and India. It’s a practice that also seems to have been celebrated by Native American tribes. Even today, there are tribes in Papua New Guinea where boys swallow the sperm of an adult as part of their initiation rite. Blowjobs have power.

Who wants a blowjob?
While blowjobs are generally accepted as a fairly normal part of a sexual encounter, studies suggest that 50 percent of straight guys report that they want to receive more oral sex.

Turn-offs or turn-ons?
If you’re guy who’s hooking-up with another guy, it’s a pretty safe assumption that blowjobs will be on the menu.

But not all guys are into the same things, so until you’ve got a bit familiar with each other you might want to play it safe to ensure that some repeat business is an option.

Cleanliness is usually a good starting point. Sure, lots of guys are into sweat and stank, but if you’re expecting a blowjob from a guy you don’t really know then having a shower and ensuring that you’re minty fresh is a sensible move.

Manscaping is something to consider. If you’re a hairy guy, a bit of a pre-blowjob trim might be a good option. Not only will it reduce the amount of stray hairs flying around, but it presents your package in its prime.

Take your time
Depending on the encounter that you’re having, a blowjob maybe all that you’ve got time for. However, if you’re not in a rush, taking your time with each other will result in a better blowjob all round and will probably lead to a further exploration of the fun that you can have together.

Practice makes perfect
Here’s some things to think about if you’re wanting to deliver a great blowjob:

  • Make him wait. You know you’re going to give him a blowjob. He knows you’re going to give him a blowjob. But don’t just dive straight in there. Foreplay of any description is all about building the anticipation and expectation. If the first step on the sexual road-map of your encounter is getting your mouth on his cock, gradually work your way towards that. Use your lips and hands to explore his body. Slowly undress him. When you eventually peel down his underwear and his cock springs free he should be so ready for you that he’s begging you to put your mouth to work.
  • Get him wet. Once you’ve got his cock in your hands and your mouth ready to go, don’t think that you’ve got to get his cock into the back of your throat as quickly as possible. Ideally, that’s where you’re heading, but take your time. Use your lips, use your tongue. Work your mouth up and down his shaft — get as much saliva as you can all over every inch of his cock. Keep jacking him while you’re working your mouth on him. Get your tongue into his balls. If he’s got a foreskin then give that as much attention as possible. Get him so turned on that he’s aching to feel your lips wrap around the head of his cock.
  • When you can’t resist any more, let the head of his cock start to slide across your tongue. Try and stay in control of the pace and momentum of the encounter. If you’re doing it right, by this point he’s going to be tempted to just grab hold of your head and throat-fuck you, but if you show him that you know what you’re doing he’ll want to experience everything you’ve got.
  • While you’re taking his cock in your mouth, keep using your hands on him. Jacking his cock while you’re sucking him, alternating your mouth and your hands. Some guys really respond to a bit of a twisting action as you work up and down their cock-shaft. Keep playing with his balls.
  • The general rule with a blowjob is no teeth. The cock is obviously a sensitive part of the body, and teeth are generally a bit of a boner killer. However, if you’re having an encounter that’s a bit more intense then you might not have to worry so much if your teeth are occasionally making contact with his cock.
  • When it comes to blowjobs, saliva is your friend. You need his cock to be spit-slick and as wet as possible. Don’t worry about slobbering all over him, that’s what you’ve got to do. If your mouth is getting dry, it’s handy to keep a bottle of water handy. You can use lubricant if you want, but nothing beats a spit-slick cock.
  • A good blowjob will often lead to rimming, but that’s a whole separate article, so we’re not going to address that here. Except to say that we’re obviously in favour. We love rimming. You also might want to use your fingers on his hole or fucking into him. Some guys really like that while they’re getting their cock sucked, for others it feels a bit like a distraction. Give it a try, the way his body responds will let you know how he feels about it.
  • As the heat between you builds, you’re going to be taking his cock deeper and deeper into your mouth and into your throat. It can take a bit of practice to build confidence and experience to know what it feels like to have a hard cock slamming into your throat. Take your time, do what you feel comfortable with. Breathing through your nose helps. The more you can relax, the deeper you’ll be able to take him. There’s nothing quite so blissful as feeling his balls slapping against your chin or nose as he slams his hard cock into the back of your throat. This is where you both lose yourself in the intensity of the moment — all he can think about is fucking your throat, and all you can think about is servicing his cock.

Gag-worthy?
When you lose yourself in the pleasure of giving an awesome blowjob, it’s fairly likely that from time to time his cock will slam so deep into your throat that you’ll gag a bit. It’s no big deal, don’t panic, just slow down the pace a little, re-focus, and get back to work.

Nipple play
It’s not always easy to multi-task while you’re focused on giving a great blow-job. If you’ve got a spare hand, give his nipples some attention. Twisting them hard is a great way to intensify what he’s feeling.

Eye contact
Giving a blowjob is one of the most intimate things you can do with a guy. It’s really important that you’re totally present in the experience. You don’t need to have constant eye-contact, that would probably raise some red flags, but looking him in the eye while you’re sucking his cock is a real turn-on and demonstrates the sexual connection you have with him.

Don’t speak
Leave the bad dialogue to vintage porn. Your mouth should be too busy to say anything, and all you want to hear from him are grunts of pleasure.

Special tricks
These are a bit superfluous if you’re giving a blowjob to a guy on a one-off random hook-up, but if you’ve got repeat business and you want to mix things up a bit then here’s a few tricks you can try:

  • Warm your mouth with warm water, this gives him a different sensation.
  • Heat up half a grapefruit. Squeeze it and cut off the end — you’re effectively making a grapefruit flesh-jack. Push his cock through it and jack him with the grapefruit while you’re also sucking him.
  • Suck on a mint and then lick his cock-head. It will give him an intense tingling sensation.
  • Play with your food. Whipped cream, chocolate sauce, or honey can all be good fun.

Spit or swallow?

  • Obviously, your encounter may not end with the blowjob, so how you enjoy each other’s cum could be a question at a different stage in proceedings.
  • There are some studies that suggest that 90 percent of guys don’t swallow — that they prefer the cum to spray over their chest or their face. That number seems high to me, so we might need to do some more research on that.
  • Sure, it may not taste exactly like pineapple juice, but feeling a guy’s cum pumping down your throat is pretty satisfying and a great testament to your blowjob skills.
Image sourced from photo library
Image sourced from photo library

Republished courtesy of Boner Magazine

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Life

Wednesday Wisdom: Heteronormativity

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Photo by Ilya Pavlov on Unsplash
Photo by Ilya Pavlov on Unsplash

I find it hard to shake my perception that dating is ultimately about finding ‘the one’ — that you may have to kiss a lot of frogs in the process, but ultimately you’re hoping to find someone that you really connect with, that you have amazing sex with, that you want to move in together and do domestic things with, that you want to introduce to your family, that you want to go on vacation with, that you want to grow old with and live happily ever after.

That’s pretty much what I’ve seen in my family, that’s what I’ve seen in movies. For some gay couples that I know, that’s exactly how it works.

It’s not difficult to understand that from all of our cultural and environmental influences, we’re being conditioned to aspire to a ‘good’ relationship that roughly fits that Hollywood ideal. This is heteronormativity in action.

One of the foundations of much of queer theory, ‘heteronormative’ is a term first coined by academic Michael Warner in 1991. Heteronormativity is the belief that the binary genders of male and female are required for people to perform the natural roles in life — assuming that heterosexuality is the default and preferable sexual orientation.

I’m not making any moral judgements about anyone’s relationship. If it works for you, then that’s great. If you want to settle down with a husband and live happily ever after, then all power to you — that’s what equality is all about.

But it is helpful to occasionally challenge ourselves by asking if our thoughts or actions are being influenced in some way by the heteronormativity that we’re all exposed to every day.

Here’s an example. A friend of mine has been with his boyfriend for years. They live together, they bought a flat together, they decided to get married. They’ve always had an open relationship — that’s worked for them. The weekend before the wedding, he was in the toilets of XXL — a club in London — getting worked over by two muscle-bears.

My instinctive reaction was — “That’s not right…” It’s the heteronormativity talking. In my head, marriage is about monogamy, and that if you were continuing to enjoy an active and open sex life then maybe marriage is not for you. But clearly I’m applying made-up rules to situations that don’t fit the heternomative model.

Obviously, an open relationship isn’t incompatible with marriage. Neither is a monogamous relationship. But this is an illustration of the complexity that we’re all navigating as marriage equality offers additional options for how we define our relationships.

It’s too easy to apply a Hollywood-happily-ever filter to our view of a marriage between two guys. But gay guys are different, we’ve been told that all of our lives, and in that difference there’s power — just because we can get married doesn’t mean that our marriages have to look like anyone else’s, the only rules that need to apply are the ones that make sense to us.

It’s important that we don’t perpetuate the perception that ‘good gays get married’ or that marriage is only meaningful if it looks like something out of a mid-career Sandra Bullock movie.

It’s not easy to find someone that you want to spend time with, to make compromises for, and perhaps it would be a lot easier if there was a black and white set of rules that all relationships had to follow. But whatever your sexuality, relationships are messy and complicated things that really only ever make sense to the people that are in them.

Embrace love, forget heteronormativity.

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